Season 1, Episode 6: Man Plans, God Laughs
"Reg, we gotta get to the paper before he does so we can cut out everything that'll piss him off." -Jake
"That pretty much leaves the weather and Charlie Brown." -Reggie
"And I hate that pathetic little clod. How hard is it to kick a football?" -Becker
"I'm trying to like people, it's just so hard to weed through the stupid ones." -Becker
"Just call me Dr. Becker, geriatric pimp." -Becker
"Sorry it took so long. Some lunatic was on the subway tracks in a Superman outfit screaming that he was more powerful than a locomotive. He wasn't." -Margaret
Written by Ian Gurvitz, Directed by Andy Ackerman
Guest starring Saverio Guerra as Bob, John Slattery as Peter, Marvin Kaplan as Mr. Gordon, Peggy Miley as Mrs. Forrester. Co-starring Peter McDonald as Witness #1.
An old high school classmate of Reggie's has heard that she is back in the old neighborhood and is working at her father's diner. He comes over to the diner to gloat over her. She used to be prom queen in high school, and rejected him, and now he makes fun of her because she's a loser working in a diner while he owns a huge restaurant supply company, has two beautiful children, and a wife with the best pair of knockers money can buy. Reggie rebuffs him, but is actually upset by what he says. Oddly enough, it is Becker that comforts her, telling her that she smart and talented and can do anything that she wants, and reminding her of the people that are worse off than her.
Becker sees his patient, Peter DeMarco, and after a full battery of tests he declares him to be very healthy. Becker and Peter get to talking about hockey, and Peter convinces Becker to stop watching about endangered turtle species on TV, and instead go to a Rangers game with him on Friday. Then Becker goes to see another patient, Mrs. Forrester, who swears that she is going to die on Tuesday because she heard a song in an elevator. Once Becker explains to her that the song is not "Goodbye Ruthie Tuesday," but instead, "Goodbye Ruby Tuesday," she is comforted, but still feels that she should plan ahead for her funeral and talks Becker into her helping her. He passes her off to another patient, Mr. Gordon, and the two of them hit it off. Becker finds out Friday afternoon that Peter died suddenly at his desk from a massive hemhorrage (spelling?) in his brain. Margaret tries to comfort him with the "God's will" speech and a bible, but Becker prefers a bottle of scotch, and learns when Reggie gets depressed she prefers pie.
Margaret is sick and leaves the office in the not-very-capable hands of Linda. Although Linda almost causes a riot, and stresses out Becker with her alphabetical method, she manages to get almost everything right by the time Margaret drags herself into the office from home to save the day.